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Where we live: A Festivus for the rest of us

Published September 06. 2019 06:41PM

There was a debate on Twitter last week as to the best “Seinfeld” episode. It was prompted by a tweet from the official Seinfeld account, which was giving away an official set replica if you guessed the top episode correctly.

Many websites have gone through this exercise, but the show’s 30th anniversary has prompted a renewed look at things.

It’s hard to pick just one, but as a Christmas Day baby, the celebration of Festivus has to climb to the top of the list.

In case you’ve forgotten, the holiday comes about as George Costanza’s father, Frank, gets in a scuffle over the increased commercialism and consumerism of the season. While my parents never rained blows upon another family while reaching for the same Christmas gift, I did have a traumatic childhood experience that likely could have been a Seinfeld episode in itself. I’m going to air one of my main life grievances now.

A child of the 1980s, I had a vintage Teddy Ruxpin doll. He was my friend. We spent many afternoons together with Teddy telling me about his trip to the dentist or his adventures in the snow.

After a few days of probably turning my attention to my professional wrestling action figures, I noticed Ruxpin was gone. He never came back, despite years of asking questions.

Years later, I came to find out he was sold at a yard sale for a quick buck. I had been blaming myself. I thought maybe I left him at a park or at a friend’s house. When you talk about consumerism, this is the very definition.

Can you imagine the look on that person’s face when they saw Ruxpin sitting on a table probably marked no higher than a couple of quarters? That savvy shopper probably also walked away with a bag full of Golden Books for pennies on the dollar. I probably could have sold them for a nice chunk of change today.

At least the action figures never left my possession. Hogan and the Macho Man are sitting in the attic patiently waiting for that day when I walk up there and reunite the Mega Powers.

Thirty years later, a Festivus miracle occurred and I received one of the new Teddy Ruxpins for Christmas. My daughter has since taken possession of it as she likes its songs about sunshine, which don’t strike as much of a chord with me now as they did at 8 years old.

Nonetheless, it’s good to have Ruxpin back, and may there always be a Festivus for the rest of us.

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